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Dear Bank of America: You suck.

Feb 2nd, 2012
by Michelle Heath.
1 comment

I got an email today from Bank of America stating that my debit card may have been compromised. Great way to start an already busy morning but happy to know they are looking out for me. So, I call and talk to a service rep who reviews the potentially fraudulent charges (which they were) and she tells me she needs to cancel my card and issue a new one. Okay, I get it. So, of course, my question at this point is: When can I get my new card? Her answer: 7-10 business days. I pause to collect my thoughts because I’m not sure on what planet a human being can live without their debit card for close to two weeks. At this point, I plead my case as to why I need it sooner and she still says no way. I pull out all the stops and she finally says she can expedite it but that I’ll have to pay $25.

image c/o johngaltfla.com

Hang on a sec. So, I did nothing to cause my card to be compromised, I now have no bank card and you’re telling me you want me to pay to get my bank card faster? And, this is why Bank of America sucks. When it comes right down to it, it’s all about the service you provide your customers and their service couldn’t be any worse. So, I ask to speak someone who can waive the fee. I get transferred to the supervisor. She apparently cannot waive the fee either and said I have to pay it. So I ask her if there is any person among the 200k+ employees at BofA who can waive the rush fee. She then tells me I need to speak with Customer Service (I thought I was talking to Customer Service all along) as they are the only ones who can waive the fee. I’ve now been on the phone for over 30 minutes and my board meeting is in an hour. After being transferred twice, I finally get the fee waived only to find out that “expedited” = 2-3 business days which still equates to almost a week given they can’t ship the card till tomorrow. The whole way around, this was a big bowl of fail. Oh and I get charged a monthly service fee for this amazing service too. Blech.

Big banks are like the computers that were built back in the 80s. Big, clunky, expensive, not user-friendly, not easy to adapt. The difference is that computers evolved into the sleeker, cheaper, easier to use laptops and tablets we use today. But the banks are still the same as they ever were except more expensive and even slower and less focused on the customer. It is amazing to me that the banking model has still not really evolved and there aren’t tons of choices for a new way to bank. When I Googled “bank of america sucks” I was faced with hundreds of entries of angry customers, including this one from John Galt who seems to second my emotion. (This key word phrase seems like a ripe Google Adwords campaign for ING Direct.) It made me wonder if BofA even listens to what people on the interwebs are saying? Seems like a big opportunity to connect with the people who buy your service but that requires expending time and resources and dollars to actually care.

So if I say to hell with big banks, where do I turn? From what I read, ING Direct seems to be the best option and Bob Griggs did a great write-up of the advantages (including great service and paper checks if you need them). It’s a pain in the ass to move your bank accounts but I am seriously considering doing it as I am sick of dealing with big banking and their complete inability to make it easy to be a customer.

Have you switched your bank account to an alternative to the big banks? Would love to hear your experience as I consider this move.

 

Why Flash-based Websites Make Me Cuckoo Bananas

Jul 5th, 2011
by Michelle Heath.
1 comment

So, I get an email today from a website design and development company telling me about their services and asking if we can set up a call so I can learn more. Cool, I get it. Cold call email. They are looking to generate some new business. Being the kind of girl I am, I decide not to say no right away and to at least take a look at their website and their work to see what they are all about. That’s when things failed big time.

I clicked on their URL and got this:

 

 

 

 

You know what that is, don’t you? It is that horrendous count-down (or count-up) you wait for when you have to load something in Flash. Now, let’s say you send me a flash app or a file or something I know is built in Flash. Well then whether it’s right, wrong or indifferent, I expect to wait for the thing to load (still annoying but my expectations are set). When you send me the url to your website, I expect it to load immediately – seconds or less – not take over 3 minutes to buffer a completely useless Flash intro that then leads me to another completely unusable Flash-based menu. I know you creative types. I am one too. I want things to look amazing and hip and all that jazz. BUT…I am also a a practical marketer and know that I only have a few seconds to convey my message before someone yawns, gets frustrated and moves on. I know HTML is not all that snazzy or sexy. It doesn’t spin and whirl and twirl. It doesn’t play music and talk. But, it loads fast and helps me get a potential customer interested right away.

If you are in the business of attracting customers and getting them to buy what you sell, skip the fancy Flash crap and get ‘em right to the goods. Your bottom line will thank you later and so will I.

<end rant>

Do you like your sports social?

Jun 6th, 2011
by Michelle Heath.
6 comments

So, if you know me, you probably know I’m not the biggest sports fan. Yeah, I know enough to chat it up. Maybe even dazzle you with a few technical terms or players names. But, I am not the girl who knows the starting line-up, every guy, who’s injured, who is throwing great or skating slow.

What I do know is how much more fun watching sport is for me because of social media. I guess it’s because of the social. Why do people go to games at the stadium? It’s because of the energy. The fans. The music. The beer. The experience. It’s 20,000 fans in team jerseys. Getting rowdy and cheering on their respective teams.

I’ve always liked hockey. Love the pace, the energy, the skill of having to control a tiny puck while skating and wielding a stick (said by a girl who can barely skate;). But, there’s been nothing like watching the Bruins duke it out for the Stanley Cup with all my Boston friends on Twitter and Facebook. Everything from predicting the next goal to predicting Game Four. It’s one thing to watch a sports event on your TV by yourself. It’s another thing to watch it while participating in the commentary with thousands of other people who share your passion for the game.

What’s your opinion – do you see social media making sporting events more fun? Tell me how you make sports social.

And now…back to the game. GO BRUINS!!

Marketing your differentiator

Mar 23rd, 2010
by Michelle Heath.
5 comments

I spent this morning at Emerson College participating on a panel as part of the School of Communication’s “Communication Week”. The Chair of the Emerson Marketing Communications department, John Davis, is passionate about hybriding the strategic and communication aspects of marketing and is building an experienced team of faculty, alumni and outside peers and influencers to enhance the program. I must admit, I didn’t know much about Emerson’s Marketing program and was very impressed by the faculty and students, along with Cathy Waters, Emerson Graduate Marketing Director.

The topic was around the role of marketing in today’s globalized world. I had the pleasure of meeting fellow panelist,  Joan Schneider, president of Schneider Associates. It’s amazing that our paths haven’t crossed until today as she is also a passionate marketer and creative brand thinker – and we tend to agree on alot of points, which is nice when you’re sitting next to someone for almost 2 hours. The conversation kicked-off around launching new products, something Joan and her firm know alot about. Being in start-up land at Currensee, launches usually happen over-night, or so it seems. Joan talked about launch planning and how she helps her clients get ready. Her advice? Start the launch planing while ideas are still ideating. Waiting until the widget comes off the assembly line is often too late to plan all the details and line up the pieces for a successful launch. I spent time talking about launching a social network and how to gain sign-up momentum. The key? Identifying your influencers – the people who are willing to try your product early and tell other people about it. Joan and I both agreed that influencers are everyone from mommy bloggers, to WSJ press to the average consumer. It’s all about figuring out who they are, how to connect with them and what helps them engage with your brand.

We talked alot about social media and how we are using Twitter, Facebook and other social channels to engage customers and how we measure the success of social media. It was a topic that picked up on the themes from last week’s Espresso lunch with friend and colleague, Marta Kagan, where we talked about how social media is creating new channels and new challenges for us as marketers. Before, customers wrote an email or called us to complain. Now we manage the trials and tribulations of upset customers who can do more to damage to a brand in 140 characters than we ever thought possible. Measurement of social engagement, awareness, lead gen and membership is blurring the lines of ROI and marketers often don’t have the time or budget for big measurement products and, quite frankly, they’re not always the answer to the measurement question.

After a great discussion that’s far too detailed to transcribe here, we opened the session to the audience, mostly comprised of students. There were some great questions:

- What do you do when you have a bad press launch? How do you measure that and communicate that to your clients/management team?

- How do you decide what level of writing is appropriate for an audience mixed with newbies and experts?

- How do you find the influencers who can help launch your brand?

- What advice do you have for finding an internship or full-time job?

The last question really stood out to me because it takes marketing full-circle. Marketing is all about identifying the differentiator – the value prop that makes your idea, brand, product or service unique from the other guy’s down the street. Then, once you figure out what that is, you write it down and convey it in everything you do – consistently and emphatically. You talk about it, you Tweet it, you find people to talk about it. The it is the differentiator and the differentiator is the marketing. When it comes to getting a job, the same rules apply. You send me a resume. I look at it. The marketer in me does a few things immediately – 1) Assess the design. Did you just use a Word doc template or did you actually get creative and create a logo or unique format? 2) Check for typos and grammar. I know, it’s so anal but I can’t stand typos in a resume. You want me to hire you but you don’t have the attention to detail to actually proof your resume before you send it to me? Trash can.  3) Scan to figure out what’s different about you. Oh, you know Word, Excel and PowerPoint…yawn. Oh, you were the captain of your lacross team? Hm, team player, competitive, interesting. Oh, you were a sugar plum fairy in the Nutcracker Ballet? Discipline, focus, practice, cool. You started a mentoring program for inner-city kids? Initiative, compassion, giving back. Love it. You did an intership for the summer? Gave up the beach for the office. That’s dedication.

In my book, you have about 30 seconds for your resume to either get my attention or not. I apologize that I have the attention span of a gnat when it comes to stuff like this but I know I am not alone. People are busy. You need to cut through the clutter and create your difference. Whether you’re marketing yourself or a product someone’s going to buy, you’ve got 30 seconds to get your differentiator across, get them to understand it and make them feel like they need it (or you) right now.

And, now, over to you. Are you marketing your differentiator?

Alltop – all but useful

Jul 8th, 2009
by Michelle Heath.
2 comments

I’ve been trying to give Alltop a chance. It has content. I like content. It’s all in one place. I like convenience. It’s a Guy Kawasaki venture. I like Guy.

But I’ve gotta say. I’m just not a fan. I’ve been trying to figure out the point of this seemingly dumbed-down headline aggregator launched in March. I keep hoping maybe I’ll be surprised with some great gem or some great nugget of information. But I keep coming back disappointed and, quite frankly, feeling a bit appeased.

Let me explain. If you haven’t used Alltop, you start by clicking on a category that interests you. You can search for something, click the actual word, or click on the letter. Easy, peasy. Let’s say you want to stay on top of the latest headlines on the topic of “Frugality.” Well, I found a great article with Tips for Stretching Meat (sounds painful) or Removing Tar from Brick (a must-read). If those weren’t enough to satisfy my hunger for content, I tried…you guessed it…bacon. Who doesn’t love bacon? But do I really need to see the Religious Side of Bacon (in bacon we trust) or try out Bacon Ice Cream (um, that’s just gross)?

So, I tried to think about why we need Alltop. Guy Kawasaki is a pretty smart guy so there must be some reason to keep up on the latest bacon news, sappy quotations, quilting tips or even acne articles. Then I realized it must be less about what it contains and more about who is using it. For those of us who have multiple RRS readers, Twitter, Facebook, FriendFeed and a bunch of other ways to gather headlines, news and the latest goings-on, Alltop seems pretty jay-vee. But, maybe if you’re the type of person who wants to go to one place to search and find the latest benign topics, Alltop could be a useful tool. I said Maybe.

I give it two-thumbs down. Sorry, Guy.

Pie and the secret of sharing

Feb 19th, 2009
by Michelle Heath.
2 comments

It seems we are encouraged at a young age to share. I am constantly telling my 2.5 year old to “be a good sharer” and “share with other people so they will share with you”. But, let’s face it. Sharing is just not natural. It’s learned and not everyone get’s on the sharing-means-caring bus.

I’m a good sharer. I love to share food – put a bunch of different plates in front of me and I’m in heaven. I always share my last piece of gum and I will let you borrow my clothes as long as you promise to bring them back in the same shape you borrowed them in (yes, I know). But it wasn’t always like this. Back in the day, I was a horrible sharer. So bad that I wrote the word “PIE” on all of my things – Baby Alive, Malibu Barbi, Easy Bake Oven, Raggedy Anne – PIE, baby. Why PIE? Who the hell knows. Pie is yummie, I guess. So, if it said PIE, it was mine. My sister remembers this phase fondly and didn’t give a crap about PIE and tried to use my stuff anyway. It wasn’t a pleasant stage. Well, luckily the PIE-phase passed (though my mom still has the dolls with PIE written across their foreheads) and I am the sharer I am. How did that happen? What changed? I am sure there are a bunch of you behavioral psych folks out there who can tell me why it changed, so come on and let us in on the secret.

For the rest of us, let’s fast forward to the here and now. So, along comes Web 2.0. The “social” era. What’s it all about….you betchya, sharing. Photos, profiles, music, friends, walls, lifestreams, hobbies, resumes, tweets, videos the list goes on. What makes some share and others adamant PIE-er? Here’s my $.02.

1. Privacy. This is probably the biggest reason. A guy in my office (who will remain un-named) will not disclose a photo of himself to anyone but his immediate family. I completely cannot relate but it’s his right to keep it to himself. I often wonder – is it the worry of what could happen if said photo hits the net and is used to begin stalking him? Or is it something simpler – perhaps a discomfort with putting yourself out there. I’ve even heard of the suppressed “Catholic Guilt” theory. In any case, people have their own reasons and for that they get the PIE stamp.

2. Time. Many of the non-sharers I talk to say it’s a waste of time. Who has time to share photos or tell people what they had for lunch? Well, then, how do you explain the droves of people on Facebook and Twitter? They have time. Some of them, yes, too much time on their hands. Others, like me, juggle a million different things and social media is just a natural part of the day. Like checking my email or sending a text message or getting my latte. It is how I live.

3. Aversion to change. Can’t teach an old dog new tricks. This is true with the people out there who just can’t change. These are also the people who say they have nothing to say. Everyone has something to say. Come on, people! These are also the people who don’t see the value in sharing, they don’t care and they’ll argue till the death against it. To them I say, bleh.

4. Generation. Age definitely plays a factor. How many of our parents are on Facebook? or iLike? or Twitter? or FriendFeed? My guess is a very small percentage. My 60 year old uncle sees Facebook as a privacy disaster waiting to happen and a good way to start a high-school girl fight (he’s a high school teacher). My dad is still trying to figure out how to upload his photos to Snapfish and send me an email to tell me I can view them. Then I see some of my friends’ dad on Facebook and wonder, would I want my dad seeing me out on the town partying it up? Hm, not so much.

5. Lifestyle. There are people out there who just aren’t in the know. Yes, I know, dear reader, it’s hard to imagine. I have a friend from high school who just got email. Yes, I said email. It’s beyond me but some people just don’t have the lifestyle desire to get on the technology or the sharing bandwagon.

So, what does all this lead to. Well, if sharing is caring, what does what you share say about you? Are you a frequent Facebook status up-dater or are you more of a lurker who is present but not participating? If you’re a sharer, what’s the quality of what you share? People are fickle. They want to be engaged and entertained. When your posting, writing, uploading – think about the quality of your content and what it says about you. If you’re a sharer, take the quality of what you’re sharing to the next level. If you’re still in PIE-mode, come on now. Maybe you can take a baby step. Try out a social media site and see what it’s like to connect with a few new people or find out something new about someone you already know. Sharing makes you a contributor. The old way of learning was very one-dimensional. Now, I learn every day thanks to social media and people who share. New websites, products, ideas, personal updates – I have the ability to take it all in and decide how to use it. That makes me smarter and that makes me happy. Be smart. Be happy. Be social.